一年の計は、1月7日くらいにあるんじゃないでしょうか。
あけましておめでとうございます。1月7日になりました。
こうして歴史は改ざんされていく。
書けるうちに書きます。
ここ3年くらい、死んでるなぁ、と思う。思考が。
何も考えてないし、すごく無為に過ごしてきた気がする。
思えばブログを書くことを放棄した時、考えることも放棄したんだろうな。
書くことが無くなって、いや、書きたいことがなくなっていくということは
それだけ日々がつまらないってことで。
覚えておきたいことがない日だってことで。
楽しいことがない日だってことで。
そしてもう一つ最近気付いたことだけど、
いつの間にか人に自分のことを語れなくなっていた。
別に夢とか理想とかそんな大層なものじゃなくて、
普段会社であったこととか、最近何を考えて過ごしているか、さえ。
書けない、言えないこの状況って何なんだろう。
今年の目標は
「また書けるようになる」「また自分を人に語れるようになる」
言わば、「元に戻る」ことにした。
でもその方法は思い付いていない。
何もかもが楽しくて書きたくて人に言いたかった3年前の自分が持っていて、
今はなくしてしまったものって何なんだろう。
なくなったのか、忘れているだけなのか、別のものに変わってしまったのかな。
だから自分に聞いてみようと思う。
そう、そのために書いていたのだった。
よかった。まんとるの壷がある理由を思い出せた。
これで一歩踏み出せた気がする。
今年は、いい年にしていこう。
あけましておめでとうございます。1月7日になりました。
こうして歴史は改ざんされていく。
書けるうちに書きます。
ここ3年くらい、死んでるなぁ、と思う。思考が。
何も考えてないし、すごく無為に過ごしてきた気がする。
思えばブログを書くことを放棄した時、考えることも放棄したんだろうな。
書くことが無くなって、いや、書きたいことがなくなっていくということは
それだけ日々がつまらないってことで。
覚えておきたいことがない日だってことで。
楽しいことがない日だってことで。
そしてもう一つ最近気付いたことだけど、
いつの間にか人に自分のことを語れなくなっていた。
別に夢とか理想とかそんな大層なものじゃなくて、
普段会社であったこととか、最近何を考えて過ごしているか、さえ。
書けない、言えないこの状況って何なんだろう。
今年の目標は
「また書けるようになる」「また自分を人に語れるようになる」
言わば、「元に戻る」ことにした。
でもその方法は思い付いていない。
何もかもが楽しくて書きたくて人に言いたかった3年前の自分が持っていて、
今はなくしてしまったものって何なんだろう。
なくなったのか、忘れているだけなのか、別のものに変わってしまったのかな。
だから自分に聞いてみようと思う。
そう、そのために書いていたのだった。
よかった。まんとるの壷がある理由を思い出せた。
これで一歩踏み出せた気がする。
今年は、いい年にしていこう。
まんとるさんがブログを書くとぼくが喜ぶので、たくさん書いてくだいね。
長い文章書くのがだるかったら twitter なんてものもあるし。
「元に戻る」ことを目標にすることはいいと思うけど、あんまり思いつめすぎて三井寿みたいにならないようにしてください。
三井寿を知らないなら明らかに教養が不足しているので、「スラムダンク」を読破することをお勧めします。（未読なの知ってて書いてるんだけどｗ）
遅くなったけど、今年もよろしくお願いします。
教養が無いからそろそろ漫画喫茶に行こうと思う！！
もしくは全巻貸してください。
あけましておめでとう！！！
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