院試お疲れ

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就寝:AM 8:30
起床:PM 12:30

もうわけわかりませんね.
昨日の夜,麻雀してたからこんなもんか.


だめだ.
今日はテンションが上がらない・・
遊びに行って,その後飲み会に行って.

色々考えてたんだけど,(午前4時)
どうあっても自分は自分が一番正しいと思う.
そうして生きていくのが一番楽しいもの.
正しく無いと思いながら生きていくとしたら,
(自分の意思に反した行動を取りながら生きていくとしたら)
それは楽しくないし,矛盾に満ちた行動だろうな.
全ての行動は「~したい」と言う欲求に基づくべきだと思うんだけれど.

そうではない,楽しい矛盾もあるのだろうか.
あったとしたら俺には理解できるのか.
そんな自己矛盾を肯定できるのか.
今は出来てないな.出来そうにない.

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コメント(88)

>「~したい」と言う欲求

…結局アレかい!!
あっ、違うの?

アレ?

うわああっ

とりあえずこの一連の流れに対してはノーコメント.

横槍ごめんなさい!
僕も自分が正しいのが一番楽しいと思います.学校は自分が行きたいから行くのであって,勉強はしたいからするわけですよね.そうじゃなきゃモチベーションが持続するわけがありません.(少なくとも僕はムリです)
個人的には,これに加えて,過去の行動に"間違い"がなかったかをチェックするのも大事じゃないかと思います.そうでないと弱い自制心ゆえに刹那主義に陥ってしまいかねませんので….
まんとるさんほどの自制心でしたら,わざわざ過去を振り返らなくても常に自分の幸福を追求できるはず!!

長ったらしくて申し訳ありませんが,一言にまとめると,"仰るとおり"だと思います.

ありがと.
こんな抽象的な文章で
誰か理解してくれると思ってなかったからびっくりだよー.

確かに間違いをチェックするのも大事だよね.
違ってる事に気付けて,
自分がもっと良いと思う方向に変わっていけたら
それはとってもすてきな事だと思います.

また近いうち会おう,ぜ!

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