今日は久しぶりに帝国行ってきました．
なんかいっつも試合してますね．
あの，なんですか，「チーム山田？」
とりあえずもっと日焼けしたい．
で，帰りに汗臭いままバイト．
帝国民がいっぱい来ました．お買い上げありがとうございまーす．
帰って夜中にご飯食べてたらなんか急に凹んで来た．
察してくれた龍貴が朝までお茶飲みながら付き合ってくれました．
ありがとうございます．私は幸せ者です．
結論は「源氏はオタである．」ということ．
全く意味が分かりませんね．
気付いたのですが，
俺は「自分で自分自身をちゃんと説明したい」んです．
こういう理由があって俺はこうなりたい，
だからそのためにこういうことをしたい．と言うように．
自分の中で矛盾している行為と言うのはあっちゃダメなんですよ．
「何でそんなことするの？」
「だってしょうがないじゃない」
自分自身の行為でしょうがなくてもいいことなんて何もありません．
そんなのただの妥協ですし，やる気が無いだけですもの．
自分自身を完全に御しきれずしてちゃんと生きてると言えるのかなぁ．
そう考えると，無理な事なんて何も無いはず．
人の考えも，行動も分かりはしないけれど，
自分自身のことは１００％把握したいな．
自分が一番ありたいと思うように，
そうなっていくように生きていかなければ．
そう思った．
確かにロリコンではあるな．＜光源氏
ああ，なるほどね．
なんで源氏がオタなのかは龍貴に聞くと詳しく説明してくれます（丸投げ）
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